Thursday, March 29, 2007

Know What's Great For Cardio? Soccer.

Thursday Bullets:

- The Browns are now in on the Trent Green sweepstakes. I propose we give the Browns the 6th round pick we got from Denver for them to take Green and end this madness.

- David Carr’s “camp” – whatever that is – is saying Carr might be looking to go to a contending team as its backup quarterback for a year or two and wait for his shot. This article suggests that Seattle and Carolina might be Carr’s best option for that plan. And the NFL Network’s Adam Schefter says that Carr has a visit scheduled with the Seahawks next week. And the Raiders are saying they might jump in on the Carr pursuit also. Meanwhile, Randy Mueller is sitting with his thumbs up his ass because Carl Peterson’s leading him by the balls.

- The Fins have expressed some interest in Broncos free agent guard Cooper Carlisle. I know there’s a lot of interest from Dolphins fans about Miami drafting Levi Brown with the 9th pick, and a lot of "expert" mock drafts have him going to the Fins as well. But Cam has said that an offense can play at a high level even without a franchise left tackle. I could be wrong, but don’t be shocked if the Dolphins pass Brown over and fill their O-line needs in the latter portion of the draft.

- Opening Day is right around the corner. I am psyched. JD’s got a nice profile on Marlins new centerfielder Alejandro De Aza. Check it out, Fish fans.

- Sweet baby Jesus, have you seen the blimp formally known as soccer great Diego Maradona??? Maradona is famous for leading Argentina over England in the 1986 World Cup semis with his famous Hand-of-God goal. Now he looks like he ate England.

He’s also done enough coke to kill a small horse.

Anyway, this news is not Miami sports based. This one’s for my Dad – Dude The Elder – because he’s a big soccer fan and because, when I was a kid, he taught me the great game of soccer. We had this running gag where he’d ask me to stand in as goalie while he placed the ball down and kicked it towards the goal. He’d then kick the ball with the outside of his foot, causing the ball to twirl haphazardly in all kinds of crazy directions before it swung violently nowhere near the goal. This made me crack up til my sides hurt. Every time. Hey, I was 7. Anyway, he called that his secret weapon. Its name: The Maradonia.
And yes, Dad, that picture is real. (Yes, my Dad reads the MSD daily).

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This Trent Green Thing May Last A While

Dolphins Bullets:

- This guy Carl Peterson? Bit of an ass. As Armando Salguero pointed out on his blog yesterday, the Chiefs' president is notorious for waiting possible deals out until the eve of the Draft. One only has to look at the Patrick Surtain deal that went down a few years ago. Apparently, Peterson is not budging from his stance that he wants a second round pick for 37 year old concussed Trent Green. And he is willing to wait until the night before the draft.

Look, the guy saw what the Falcons got from Houston for QB Matt Shaub and feels he's entitled to demand the same thing for his guy. But there's a few things Carl is apparently not keen on. First off, the Falcons robbed Houston with that deal. This is the same Houston team, mind you, that drafted some guy whose name I can't even remember first overall last year and passed on Vince Young and Reggie Bush. Secondly, Peterson's gotta put down the bong. No one is going to give him a second round pick for Green. Steve McNair was traded to Baltimore last year for a fourth. We got Joey Harrington for a fifth.

If the Dolphins are waiting for the Chiefs to just cut Green, I guess that's fine. But if we give the Chiefs any picks -- at any level -- we're getting shafted in that deal. But the Lions are in on the Green chase too. So they may just go ahead and give KC a second and a third rounder. Because Matt Millen is a retard.

- Speaking of not giving away draft picks for 37 year old quarterbacks ... we need all the picks we can get. It's looking more and more like we're about to lose one of our 6th round picks.

- Wayne Huizenga says he wants "character guys" on this team. I want guys who can play defense like Lawrence Taylor (coke/stripper addict), catch and run like Randy Moss (malcontent/moons crowds) and throw the football like Dan Marino (partied a lot in college/eats that NurtiSystem crap). But that's just me.

- Oh and Joey Porter? A change in teams hasn't changed the fact that he's still a dick.



Go Fins.

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The Guy Who's Never Heard of Chewbacca Dropped 14 Points On A Tired, Hapless Heat

TJ Ford and the Raptors Take Back The 3rd Seed

The Miami Heat were in first place in the Southeast Division. They managed to stay there for one whole day. The Heat dropped what amounts to a pretty significant game to the Raptors, 96-83. In what is becoming a bit of an annoying habit, the Heat started off really slow and pretty much played that way all night. This is now the 4th loss in 6 games. When the Heat woke up yesterday morning, things were peachy. They were the Number 3 seed in the East and in first place in the division. They left Canada last night and, as if they were sucked into some crazy northern air space vortex, are now suddenly the Number 6 seed. Damn you Canada! And while our hosers got their asses handed to them by the Raptors, Agent Zero and the Wiz slid back into first in the division.

The Heat looked pretty old most of the night. I mean Mr. Roper old. They were out hustled, out rebounded and out scored. Kris Humphries out-rebounded the entire Heat squad except for James Posey, who grabbed 10 himself but evened things out with his own sucktitude by scoring only 8 points. You know, because he didn’t want to be left out of this crap-fest. It’s all about teamwork.

It’s bad enough when you have a star player like Chris Bosh drop 13 points and 18 rebounds on your ass. But when you let a white dude from Chaska, Maine come off the bench and grab 10 boards while Eddie Jones, Antoine Walker, Udonis Haslem, Alonzo Mourning and Dorrell Wright combined for 11, that’s just pathetic.

Meanwhile, Dwyane Wade believes he’s going to be ready for the playoffs. While Coach Riles continued to down play Wade’s possible return by telling us all to calm the hell down, it’s apparent that this Heat team has hit it’s peak. The 10 game winning streak that it rode after Wade went down was nice. But now it’s beginning to show what kind of team it will be without D-Wade.

A suck-ass team that's old and tired.

C'mon, D-Wade. Get well soon. REAL soon.

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Wednesday, March 28, 2007

MSD Mock Draft Contest

The NFL Draft is exactly one month away and with all the mocks out there we still have no earthly idea who the hell the Dolphins are going to select with their first pick.

So, with that said, I wanted to announce the first annual MSD Mock Draft Contest.
What You Win:

1.) A brand new copy of the Miami Herald book Marino: Stories From A Hall Of Fame Career

2.) A Miami Sports Dude t-shirt!

3.) One free post here on MSD to write about whatever you choose as long as it is in no way deragatory towards the Dolphins, the Heat, me, other MSD commenters or anything else that might piss me off. Otherwise, the floor will be yours.

The Rules:
1.) Go to the View My Complete Profile link on the right side of this blog (located under the Dude's mug) and then e-mail me your entry. In the subject line please write: MSD DRAFT CONTEST

2.) In your e-mail you will give me your first round mock draft (1-32).

3.) The winner is decided on who comes the closest to nailing down all 32 picks.

4.) If there is more than one entry with the correct answers, then the winner will be decided on a couple of tie breakers: A.) The one who got the Dolphins pick correct or, if that doesn't work, B.) A coin flip. If, for some reason, the coin flip doesn't work (in case there is more than 2 winners) then two names will be randomly pulled from my Dolphins cap, then I'll flip a coin, then that person will be declared the winner. Don't like the tie-breaker? Fuck you. It's my game.

5.) The last day I will accept an entry will be Friday April 27th. The day before the Draft.

BONUS GAME: If you feel lucky, send me the Dolphins' entire mock draft -- every Fins pick for every round. If any one gets that right (and I mean 100% right) I'll throw in a couple of gift cards from Dave & Busters.

So send in those entries.

And be sure to come visit me here on Saturday, April 28th as I will be live blogging the NFL Draft, spilling beer on my laptop and calling down curses onto Randy Mueller and his kin after every Fins pick. It'll be loads of fun!
Questions or suggestions? Leave them in the comments. Good luck!


MORE RULES:
1. One entry per person please
2. This is a blog contest that is not being promoted by anyone other than me, the Dude, so I have the right to refuse anyone the awards if I deem said person to be a total dick. i.e. Be cool about this, people. It's all in fun and you're getting free shit from my own pocket. So don't act like one of those pick-up basketball pricks who think they're playing in the NBA and act like jackasses.
3. As this is the first time I do something like this, expect more rules to be be added and/or altered in the coming weeks.

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Wednesday Bullets

Another crazy busy day for me .... another bullets post for you. Gotta run, the boss has me running around town looking for eggplant calzones' for him. Big Stein's gotta eat! ...


- Another day, another Dolphin bolts to an AFC East rival.

- A Q & A with Dolphins owner Wayne H. Huizenga. "Just because you're an owner doesn't mean you know what the heck is going on." I didn't make that up. He actually said that.

- Dolphins Notebook highlights:

Ricky Williams is writing a book.

Chris Chambers must be a member of MSD Nation. ''(Trent) Green is a Pro Bowl quarterback,'' Chambers said. ``I don't know how much he has in the tank. He's pretty old as far as football years. Carr is a young, fiery guy. I actually like him. Once he gets a fresh start, he'll be a pretty good quarterback.''

Ricky Williams is writing a book!

Jason Taylor likes the direction the team is taking: ''I understand what they're trying to do. When you're 6-10, you've got to rebuild because you didn't do enough to win enough games. There are different levels of rebuilding. Hopefully, we're not on a total tear-down. We can be a playoff contender for sure. We can be in the AFC Championship Game like New Orleans was [in the NFC Championship]. We can turn it around very quickly.''

Ricky Williams is writing a book!!!!

- Armando Salguero breaks down even further why trading for Trent Green -- and dealing with the Chiefs' front office in general -- is a bad idea.

- Guess who's feeling better and is getting ready to come back? Oh yea. (Happy now, Cliff? Douchey McDouchebag.)

- Remember Ugueth Urbina? He helped the Marlins win the 2003 World Series. He was a shut down closer. He kissed Ivan Rodgriguez on the lips after every win. He's a flame thrower. No, litterally. He's a flame thrower. And he's going away for a while. He's now officially the craziest sports figure in Miami sports history.

- And in the "Dolphins News Is Rather Slow Lately" category: A tribute to Olindo Mare.

- Congrats to the Big Aristotle as he passed Reggie Miller for 12th on the all-time on the NBA scoring list. Can you dig it?

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Monday, March 26, 2007

The Dude Gets Tanked


A few weeks ago, the good folks over at Most Valuable Network asked me to join their staff as a contributing writer for their Miami Dolphins site, The Phish Tank.
MVN.com has been around since 2003 and prides itself on being the first and largest sports blog network on the internet. It has sites for just about every major professional and collegiate sports team in its network. Some of you may be familiar with The Phish Tank, which is one of the original Dolphins blogs to emerge onto the scene and features the fine work of Sean Fowler and Gabriel Santamaria.

As a contributor there, I plan on posting one or two columns a week. My work there will be more on the analytical and investigative side of things. More “serious,” if you will. But I’ll still try to be as entertaining as I can while dishing out info and opinion on our beloved Dolphins. And I wanted to invite you, MSD Nation, to come join the fun over at the tank and leave me a comment or two whenever I post. I’ll let you know here on MSD with a link whenever I do write something over there. You can also find The Phish Tank link over on the Miami Herald Dolphins page. Or, you can always bookmark.

But do not fret MSD Nation. While over there I’m called by my Christian name. Over here, I’m still the Dude. And this will still be the number one place where I post my daily thoughts on the Fins and await your crazy comments throughout my day. While the Phish Tank will be for the journalist in me, the MSD will be the place where I am free to make fart jokes, say words like “douchebag” and "jack ass" and call guys like Mark Cuban “the Billion Dollar Penis” and the Dolphins front office a bunch of idiotic monkeys.

The Phish Tank is where I’ll do my serious work. The MSD will be where I spend Happy Hour. And, as the Dude, I plan to spend more time in Happy Hour than at “work,” if you catch my drift.

So, just wanted to share this with you. I just posted my first column – a more detailed argument of something I’ve already covered here: Why the Dolphins should forget about Trent Green and go get David Carr.
Drop by and leave me a comment if you can.

Otherwise, I’ll see you at the bar, douchebags.

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Monday Morning Updates....

Here's the latest happenings from the Dolphins' front office monkeys ...

Not much has changed in the Trent Green talks. We're now learning that the extra compensation KC wants for Green is a second round pick.

Let me say that again. KC wants a second round pick for Trent Green. I'll wait while you clean the coffee off your PC screen. I too did a spit take when I read that.

PFT is reporting that the Dolphins are split between Green and David Carr.

"A league source tells us that the Miami Dolphins front office currently is split on the question of whether to sign free-agent quarterback David Carr, or to continue to pursue a trade with the Chiefs for quarterback Trent Green. The source also says that Carr's first choice for his first post-Texan team is the Dolphins."

I'm at a loss for words. It's Drew Brees vs. Daunte Culpepper all over again! It's like Nick Saban never left.

PFT is also reporting "that the chances (we're told) of quarterback Daunte Culpepper returning to the Dolphins in 2007 are 60-40 against."

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Sunday, March 25, 2007

Peyton Manning's Mom Was Cut By The Dolphins

Peyton Manning revealed last night on SNL that his Mom, Olivia Manning, tried out and was cut by the Dolphins. Must have been back when Shula was still running things because if it was during the new suck-ass eras, she'd already be signed to a multi-million dollar extention by now.

Hey, if we're going after Trent Green, we should just go ahead and try to re-sign Olivia. Might as well. Signing Trent Green and giving away draft picks for him makes as much sense as signing a middle-aged menopausal woman …

Anyway, in case you missed it, there’s Peyton’s opening monologue from last night’s SNL. Two things to notice -- he takes an awesome shot at the Patriots, and when he introduces his family, little brother Eli looks as awkward and indecisive as he does in the pocket. Great unintentional comedy.

And below – the highlight of the show – a United Way spoof that is an instant classic. Enjoy...

Update (Monday 12:50 PM): The cronies at NBC are cracking down on their videos being shown on YouTube. I managed to track down another one and just re-posted it. So, if you haven't seen it yet, hurry up and click play and watch it before the NBC Video Gestapo take this one down too...

Update 2 (Wednesday 12:18 PM): I tracked down yet another one and reposted it again. I'm like the Robin Hood of YouTube. The cool Errol Flynn Robin Hood. Not the shitty Kevin Coster Robin Hood. Although I can also be the Disney Robin Hood because he was portrayed by a Fox and that's exactly what I am ...

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Saturday, March 24, 2007

Dolphins QB Situation Update: The Return of Rick Spielman?

According to Trent Green's agent, the Dolphins and Green have a contract in place that would make Green a Dolphin. However, the Chiefs are suddenly asking for more compensation from Miami than originally agreed. This has a lot to do with what the Texans gave up to the Falcons for QB Matt Shaub this week. Chiefs President Carl Peterson met with Randy Mueller on Wednesday at the University of Tennessee's pro day. Peterson and Mueller will talk again when they see each other at the NFL owners' meetings, which begin tomorrow in Phoenix.

No news on David Carr since his release from the Texans yesterday. But the general consensus is that there are a good handful of teams that will make a run at him. It’s also assumed the Dolphins will make a run at Carr should the Green deal fall through.

Meanwhile, the Fins expect Daunte Culpepper to be ready for the team’s min-camps, which start next month.

So, here's what we know so far:

1.) Trent Green and the Dolphins have reportedly agreed on a deal.
2.) The Chiefs want more than just a 6th or 7th round pick for him.
3.) David Carr is a free agent and will likely be pursued by the Raiders, Lions, Browns and Vikings.
4.) Meanwhile, Mueller will supposedly meet with Carl Peterson on Sunday to figure this whole Trent-to-Miami thing out.

So while we’re dicking around with Peterson and the KC front office, someone else is going to look to scoop up Carr while holding on to all their draft picks in the process.
Cam Cameron told reporters yesterday, "We’re going to build this team through the draft." But how can they do that if they’re possibly giving into Peterson’s demands for higher picks? Giving up valuable picks for a 37 year old concussed QB, while a perfectly good, healthier, younger, talented QB is out there looking for a job.
I’m going to give Mueller and Cam the benefit of the doubt here. No one can be this stupid and give up more valuable picks for Green. Seriously. Unless Rick Spielman left Minnesota and is secretly running things here again and no one's told us.
Here’s a scene I hope goes down on Sunday when Mueller runs into Peterson at the owner's meetings in Phoenix:
“Hi Carl. Nice tie! Helluva meeting, huh? Damn that Rooney can talk some shit. What a rambler. For a second there I thought I was at a Mutual of Omaha convention. Man what I need right now is a coffee and one of them hotel front desk honeys to take me down town. Know what I'm saying? Huh? Oh yea. (stretches, scratches his head and looks at his watch) Ahhh ... anyway ... about our deal for Green. I was thinking it over and we’re going to go ahead and move on. We’ve got other players in mind and, frankly, we want to keep the draft picks we have. Thanks anyway. I'll catch you later.”

Is it too much to ask this team to do the right thing for once? Is it too much to ask the front office to make the smart move for once?
Forget Trent Green, Dolphins. Let’s keep our picks. Let’s go after Carr. Let’s move on from the days of incompetence to the days of being respectable again.

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Friday, March 23, 2007

David Carr Is A Free Agent


David Carr is officially a free agent.

This means we don't have to give up any draft picks.

Go get him, Dolphins.

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Trade For Green Close To Completion

As per PFT, the NFL.com's Adam Schefter is reporting that the trade between the Dolphins and Chiefs for Trent Green is getting closer to becoming a reality.

"Per Schefter, the Dolphins and Green have nearly reached an agreement on a new contract, which surely would reduce significantly Green's base salary of $7.2 million. The only remaining hurdle is the striking of a deal between Miami and Kansas City. Published reports indicate that the Fins are willing to send the seventh-round pick (one of the last in the draft) that was obtained from the Patriots as part of the Wes Welker trade. The Chiefs, apparently, want more."

And the Sentinel is reporting that Green says he wants to be a Dolphin.

Maybe Green saw that the Fins were talking to the Texans about David Carr. Maybe talking to Houston about Carr was all a ploy to speed up the process with Green. Maybe Schefter is trying too hard to make people realize he's better than Chris Mortensen. This is the same guy who said Donte' Stallworth and Miami pretty much had a deal. Then Stallworth signed with New England. Doh.

Either way. If the report is true, this sucks all kinds of ass. There better be a grand master scheme here that we're not seeing. There better be a bigger picture. There better be a plan better than this. Because the Wizards behind the curtain who we've been raving about and have welcomed into town with open arms are suddenly beginning to look and act very much like the former jack-ass who ran this team.

Ugh. Stay tuned ...
UPDATE:
The Houston Chronicle is reporting that David Carr could be released by the Texans as early as this weekend.
Update 2:
Meanwhile, Cam Cameron spoke to the media about his team's quarterback situation. And said a whole lotta nothin'.
Update 3:
The Texans have released David Carr. GET ON THE PHONE, MUEL!!!

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That New Carr Smell

The Dolphins are in talks with the Texans about quarterback David Carr. This is good news. At least take a look. That's all I ask. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

Houston can't be asking for too much for Carr. They're in no position to. He's under contract - a huge contract -- and the team has already made it clear that Matt Shaub wil be the starter. No team wants a former first round QB earning multi-millions as their backup.

The Texans do want maybe a mid-round draft pick.

"But if the Dolphins really want Carr, they can have him, the personnel official said, by exchanging first-round picks with the Texans. The Texans have the No. 10 pick. The Dolphins are scheduled to pick at No. 9."

Swap the 9th and 10th picks? If that's all it takes -- and nothing more, Mueller -- then I'd do this swap. It's only one pick higher and the players the Fins are targeting will still be there (I'm telling ya, Houston wants Levi Brown more than the Fins do). If that's all it takes -- and nothing more, Mueller -- then we essentially get two players for the price of one.

I spoke about the Dolphins getting Carr last year over at my old site. He's a talented QB. He's a great athlete. Is he the answer? Probably not. That's why I believe very strongly that the Fins must draft a quarterback this year. But if it's insurance the Dolphins are seeking, if their not in-love with Daunte, if Cleo is not the way to go ... then Carr presents the best option out there. Better than Trent Green. Better than Tim Rattay. Better than Jake Plummer. Carr is not Joey Harrington. Carr is more physically gifted than Harrington, can make every throw a QB needs to make, is more mobile, is tougher, is an accurate passer and has all the tools to be a solid QB. He's just a little shell shocked. But that's fine.

I'll take shell-shocked over Peg Legs and Noodles-For-Brains any day.

Get Carr, Dolphins.

(Just don't freaking over pay for him!!!)
UPDATE:
The Houston Chronicle is reporting that David Carr could be released by the Texans as early as this weekend.
Update 2:
The Texans have released Carr.

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Thursday, March 22, 2007

Apparently, The Dolphins Think It's The Year 2000

The Dolphins signed wide receiver Az-Zahir Hakim today.

Well, that solves our WR troubles. And with the Fins still in talks with Trent Green, this team is shaping up to be an offensive juggernaut.

In 1999.

Maybe we can talk Marshall Faulk out of retirement. Then we'd really be set!
Watch out New England! We've got big troubles for you!
"Wooo!
You got a date next season, baby!"


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Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Green To The Dolphins Imminent?

The Palm Beach Post is reporting that the only thing holding up the Dolphins completing a trade for Chiefs QB Trent Green is a new contract. The Dolphins are apparently asking Green to take a major pay cut -- from $7.2, $7.7 and $9.2 million he is due over the next three seasons -- to a whopping $820,000 (the league minimum). The Dolphins would then hand over one of their 7th round picks to the Chiefs.

"The Dolphins are continuing talks with Green's representatives and, a source said, the two sides are 'in the same ballpark' and the deal is 'still likely' to get done. Dolphins coach Cam Cameron and quarterbacks coach Terry Shea have coached Green in the past and he is well-schooled in Cameron's offense."

I will never understand this move. But, once Green does become a Dolphin, I suppose I'll have to find some positives in it. In the meantime, this tells me a number of things:

#1. No matter how much positive press we get or how much we read about how well Daunte Culpepper's off-season workouts and rehab is going or how much progress he's made, this team is simply not feeling good about Culpepper right now. Not when you're giving up draft picks for a 37 year old concussed player.

B. There's going to be a log-jam at QB this year. Culpepper, Cleo Lemon, Green ... and whomever the Fins decide to draft in April (you guys are drafting a QB this year, right? Right??!!).

3. Two gimpy quarterbacks, Lemon and a rookie means the team must address the offensive line in a major way in April.

And D. This move doesn't say much for Cleo Lemon either. If they have to make this trade, then I hope it's a one year deal -- 2 years tops. The only way this transaction makes any sense to me is if Culpepper truly is a shell of his former self and the Dolphins draft either JaMarcus Russell, Brady Quinn, Drew Stanton, Kevin Kolb or Trent Edwards in April as the future franchise QB for this team. Otherwise ... what the hell are we doing???

Hopefully I'll be proven wrong about Green. But I had this same feeling about Culpepper last year. Guh.

And, by the way, if the Dolphins are interested in getting Houston QB David Carr -- who has become expendable now that the Texans gave up a bunch of draft picks and each of the coaching staff's first born to the Falcons for QB Matt Shaub -- money will be the major issue. Carr is set to earn $6.75, $5.5 and $6.0 million over the next three seasons. As I mentioned in the comments, this is the guy we should be going after if we're really in the market for another quarterback.

Your thoughts?

P.S. Thanks for the tip, Brigadier Pudding. Once again MSD Nation comes up huge! You guys kick ass!!


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A Quickie With The Dude

Brief Wednesday Afternoon Bullets:

- An interview with Cam Cameron. Boring is as boring does.

- The Sun-Sentinel says the Dolphins' off-season moves leaves lots of questions. Seriously, if one more SoFla fish-wrapper bitches about us being "out bid" for Donte Stallworth and "losing" Wes Welker, my head is going to explode. This is what happens when the news is slow.

- RealFootball argues the case for going after Randy Moss. It's a decent argument. But I don't see it happening.

- I really don't understand this. I really don't.

- A lot of the mock drafts out there -- as well as a lot of you guys -- see the Dolphins drafting OT Levi Brown at No. 9. But according to this article, the Fins "do not think highly of former Penn State left tackle Levi Brown." I don't see Brown in a Dolphins uniform. The way I see it, the Browns are going to take Brady Quinn and the Texans, who also want Quinn and pick No. 8, will then take Brown once Quinn is off the board. This will leave the Fins with two options: Take the best available player (I still think they're taking Okoeye) or trade down to the middle part of the first round.

Update: As reported here by Roro Kid and elaborated by FinFan1 (MSD Nation commenters!), the Texans have traded for QB Matt Shaub from Atlanta. The trade includes the two teams swapping first round picks next month ... which opens the door for Levi Brown becoming a Dolphins a little more. The Texans went from the 8th pick to the 10th and it's clear Atlanta is not targeting an OT. So ... there you have it. Levi may be a Dolphin yet ... Tomorrow I plan on posting why the Dolphins won't trade up and then a half hour later, the NFL Network will report that the Fins and Lions have swapped picks ...

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Monday, March 19, 2007

Joey Porter In Vegas. What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

Joey Porter was cited for misdemeanor battery Sunday after allegedly punching Bengals left tackle Levi Jones in the face at a Vegas casino.

"The Las Vegas Review-Journal reported that Porter had a brief altercation with Cincinnati left tackle Levi Jones while at a gaming table at the Palms Casino. Jones required on-site medical attention, Las Vegas police spokesman Lt. Kevin McMahill told the Review-Journal." [Sun-Sentinel]

This will likely turn into a slap on the wrist. As Dolphins fans, we don't have to worry. I mean, this happend in Vegas. Those kind of late-night shenannigans don't happen here in Miami. Never.

Apparently, Jones and Porter have a history. Maybe this is why Porter chose the Dolphins over the Bengals. Maybe Porter is just pissed that Jones seems to dominate him when they play against each other. Maybe Jones said something about Porter's nick-name.

But I disagree. Look at the evidence. The fight was at a gaming table. And anyone who's ever been to Vegas with a buddy knows how infuriating it is when your buddy won't stand at 19. Everyone knows you never ask for a hit at 19!!!

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...AND that's it.

Winning Streak Over
It's not that the winning streak being over sucks. As bad as it is to drop a winning streak. It's that it came at the hands of the Orlando Magic. Meh.


Either way, if you had told me the Heat would go 10-3 in its first 13 games without an injured Dwyane Wade, I would've slapped you in the face and called you Shirley.

So I'll take it. And so will you, Shirley.

Next up: at Atlanta on Wednesday.

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Sunday, March 18, 2007

Dolfan Denny

R.I.P.

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Friday, March 16, 2007

... AND Rolling ...

Brad Miller Is Aghast and Bewildered By The Devastating Supremacy Of The Crushernaut!
“Ah! Help me, Ron Artest! I am disoriented and defeated! I have beheld the power and spectacle of the Crushernaut. And it is malevolent!”


Heat beat the Kings. That's 9 in a row. 10-2 since D-Wade went down. The MSD Reverse Jinx has now hit ludicrous speed.

I really don’t have deep analysis or commentary. It’s 1:00 AM. I’ve been waiting to post since the game ended. But blogger took one of its massive dumps tonight and has been shut down for a while. I too have been suffering from a frail stomach tonight. I’m weak and near dehydration. Must’ve been the Ricardo Maltoban steak grilled taquitos.

"KHAN!!!!!"

Anyway, here's what I got: This winning streak is awesome. We’re winning without Wade. Shaq has been dominant. Eddie Jones has been playing out of his mind. James Posey is a human dynamo. Antoine Walker still shoots inexplicable threes at the most ill conceived times but he's done his share. The Heat are playing excellent team ball right now.

But make no mistake. This team has NO CHANCE of making a defending championship run of any kind without Dwyane Wade.

So let's hope for a full recovery for our MVP. And let's keep this thing rollin' ...

LET’S GO HEAT! LET'S GO DR. ANDREWS!

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Thursday, March 15, 2007

... And Rolling ...

Un-Emulate-able
The Diesel is playing like a man possessed. The Nets are the latest victim to get steamrolled by the awesome force that is the Big Aristotle. And since Dwyane Wade has been out rehabbing his dislocated shoulder, the Heat have gone 9-2.

Yes, the Miami Heat would like to remind everyone that they're still the World Champions of the NBA. And still very much alive.

Be afraid, NBA. Be very afraid.

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Dolphins Moving Up?


Last week I wrote this: "Armando Salquero says the Dolphins won’t do that. But I think it’s very possible. With all the draft picks we’ve accumulated this off-season, I’m sure we can swing something. The Lions have said they’re interested in trading down and acquiring more picks. Why not swap spots with the Lions and then hand them a 3rd round pick or, if push comes to shove, the 40th pick (the one we got for Wes Welker)?"

Today Salguero writes this: "...the Dolphins are interested in speaking with quarterbacks JaMarcus Russell and Brady Quinn, and could bring both to South Florida as part of their annual visits of college players ... The reason the Dolphins want to talk to both players could be telling: They could be considering a scenario where they trade up to the No. 2 overall pick, where Detroit is listening to offers ... The Dolphins have the No. 9 pick in the draft, and have two second-round picks."


Hoo ahh, Armando!!!
Update:
PFT has posted Salguero's column and agree that the Fins could be plotting a move to trade up in round one.

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Wednesday, March 14, 2007

"Hi Randy. This is Mike calling from Denver. Yea. About that trade we made? ..."

Big Daddy is M.I.A.

And that means we could lose that 6th rounder* we got for him from the Broncos. According to the Palm Beach Post, Dan Wilkinson needs to take a physical for Denver by tomorrow or else the trade will be voided. ProFootballTalk.com (I really gotta get those guys on my blogroll) says that neither the Fins nor the Broncos have been able to get a hold of him. He's not answering his phone. He can't be found.

PFT also writes: "The thinking in some league circles is that, although Wilkinson says he plans to retire, he wants to be able to play in 2007 without having to participate in an offseason program. Some believe that, if the Broncos or the Dolphins were to tell Wilkinson that he doesn't have to show up for offseason workouts, Wilkinson would relent."

Wilkinson doesn't want to participate in any offseason programs. Can you blame him? Look at him. He's an Adonis! Still ... he goes all Jimmy Hoffa on our asses? This is why we're losing out on a valuable extra draft pick? What are the chances he emerges in Denver by tomorrow for that physical? I'd say the odds of Wilkinson being a no-show are as high as him being able to swallow Olindo Mare whole.

We have to assume we've lost the pick. And another defensive tackle. This time to retirement (and possibly to some KFC popcorn chicken value meals). Yet some people still debate that we shouldn't address the position in the draft. People, people ... ...


Meet No Face

In other Dolphins news: The team's official website released a Meet David Martin page. Or as we call him here at the MSD, No Face. Basically because no one knows who he is, the local sports media can't even remember his name when they mention him in blog entries and this may be the quietest free agency signing for a starter this team has ever had.
Thus, the nick-name.
Now, I'm not saying I regret that we let Good Hands go. Dropping passes in the red zone and hitting women is no way to through life. What I am saying is that, come mid-season, I'm betting that we're all going to be whining about how this team has no tight end. No Face is a solid enough player. But he's a bit of an injury risk. He's been in the league 6 seasons. Only once has he played an entire 16 week season. Not sure he's the answer at TE. But if he can prove himself worthy, he shall earn himself a better nick-name. Or maybe we'll just call him David Martin.
Offensive Lineman Anyone?
Free agent guard Matt Lehr will visit the Dolphins next week. Leur started at left guard for the Falcons the past two seaons. He was suspended 4 games last season for violating the NFL's steroids policy. He was released by new Falcons coach Bobby Petrino on Monday. Don't know much else about Leur. But I do know we need beef. And he's beef. With a side of HGH.
More Dolphins stuff as I get it. And remember, get them mock drafts ready ...
*Thanks JD.

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Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Heat Keep On Rollin' ...

LEEEEROOOOOY JENNNKENNS!!!

Antoine Walker scored all of his 13 points in the final 11 minutes, and the streaking Miami Heat erased a 17-point second-half deficit to beat the Utah Jazz 88-86 on Tuesday night.

Miami matched its largest comeback of the season and finished a 6-0 homestand -- all without Dwyane Wade, the reigning NBA finals MVP who is out with a dislocated left shoulder.

"With D-Wade out, everybody's been stepping up," Walker said. "And every night, it's been someone different for us." [ESPN]

And this from Ira Winderman's blog: "Give Antoine Walker credit: He never stops shooting."

There's a joke in there somewhere. It really wants to come out. But I'll hold back. 'Toine did us good tonight. 'Toine did us good ... Antooooinne Waaaaaaalkerrrrr!!!!!

Don't look now... but the Heat are rollin' while D-Wade sits out and rehabs.

Oh ... and Rick, it's called a reverse jinx.

Hoo-ahh ...

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Monday, March 12, 2007

CRUSHERNAUT!!!

THE CRUSHERNAUT EATS LIGHTNING
AND CRAPS HIBACH!!!

True.

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Friday, March 09, 2007

Alan Branch Is The New Brady Quinn

We’re about seven weeks from the draft and already “expert” mocks are being altered. Again. With the combine behind us and individual pro days being held this month and with all the off-season moves, the mock-drafts will change more often than Tom Brady knocks people up.

The majority of the first batch of mock drafts had Brady Quinn falling to the Dolphins at 9. Since then, however, much has changed. I’ve made no secret of my desire for us to get Quinn. There’s a lot of debate on whether or not he’s going to be a star, an average player, or a bust. Some say he’s a poor man’s Peyton Manning. Others say he’s a rich man’s Joey Harrington. I think he’s the best quarterback in this class. And I think he’s a guy you want to build a franchise around. And I think this team will go nowhere until they find a long-term solution at QB. But several things are hindering Quinn from becoming a Dolphin.

First, there was his pro day. It went very well. There’s also the fact that the Browns recently signed Jamal Lewis, which might get them out of the running for RB Adrian Peterson, whom many had going to Cleveland at 3. Quinn is from Ohio and has said that he’d like to be a Brown. Then there’s Detroit. No one knows what the hell Matt Millen is capable of. But the Lions have said they like Quinn (they hold the second overall pick). The Texans have all but given up on David Carr and have also said they’d draft Quinn should he fall to 8 (one pick before ours).

This sucks more than Paris Hilton at an all night party at Mansion.


So ... now the flavor of the week comes in the form of Michigan DT Alan Branch. The majority of the latest mock-drafts have the Fins taking Branch at 9.

Branch is considered by most to be the premier defensive tackle in the draft. At 6’6, 324 lbs. he’s a monster of a man but is also agile and quick. He clocked in a 5.04 in the 40 and recorded 33 reps in the 225 lbs. bench press. He’s experienced in the 3-4 defense. He’s known for taking on multiple blockers at once, which would benefit guys like Jason Taylor and Joey Porter in pass rush plays and is powerful enough to break blocks and make plays against the run. With the aging DT position, Branch seems like a safe choice. And he’d be a youthful injection into a defensive squad that’s a bit aged.

But, I have my concerns with Branch. He didn’t have a great combine. Some scouts say he was sloppy in his drills and looked out of shape. And his endurance and stamina have been an issue at times in his college career. He’s a great player but I’m not completely sold.

I understand the mock-drafts’ view points. He’s supposedly the best DT in the draft, would fill a big need for the Fins and would in all likelihood start from day one.


As for Quinn, I’ve always thought the early mock-drafts where he falls to 9 were a bit ludicrous. I’ve always felt that if the Fins were going to get him, they were going to have to trade up.

Armando Salquero says the Dolphins won’t do that. But I think it’s very possible. With all the draft picks we’ve accumulated this off-season, I’m sure we can swing something. The Lions have said they’re interested in trading down and acquiring more picks. Why not swap spots with the Lions and then hand them a 3rd round pick or, if push comes to shove, the 40th pick (the one we got for Wes Welker)? Unless the Fins feel Quinn’s not worth that price. Then you stay put and hope Levi Brown falls to you. But the problem there is that Brown’s stock is also rising and you have several teams picking ahead of us with offensive line needs.

So it looks like Brady Quinn and Levi Brown could both be gone by the time the 9th pick rolls around. Alan Branch is a solid player. But I’d rather we focus on drafting offensive players – especially in the early portions of the draft. Then again, the draft will look completely different in a few weeks and the mock-drafts will have us taking Greg Olsen with our first pick.

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Thursday, March 08, 2007

At Last, Our Long National Nightmare Is Over

Thursday Bullets (Updated) :

- The Dolphins have signed K Jay Feeley. Olindo Mare is now free to go blame his missed field goals on the length of the grass somewhere else.

- What's this? The Heat beat the Bulls? They routed them? Whoa crap! I'm suddenly feeling a lot better about D-Wade's possible return. Long live The Bracketus!!!

- Speaking of The Bracketus, he's getting his very own reality show. For fat kids. Apparently Charles Barkley had other commitments.

- Hey, a football related Ricky Williams update! He's going to try to get re-instated into the NFL. All jokes aside, we need Ricky. We lost Travis Minor and Sammy Morris to free agency. Did I just say "all jokes aside...we lost Minor and Morris," implying that their loss has somehow left a huge void in our backfield? Yea, I think I just did. Sorry.

- Remember the guy Jimmy Johnson elected to draft over Drew Brees back in 2001? He's visiting the Titans. If he signs there, it'll be his fourth team in 6 seaons. (For those of you who have chosen to forget, his name is Jamar Fletcher*.) Meanwhile, the Dolphins are still trying to figure out how to fix their QB problem and fill the hole at CB. Thanks Jimmy! Have another Corona and, you know, drive home...

- Chris Chambers will not be a part of the Randy Mueller purge. Call me crazy, but I like Chambers. He's not a pure number one receiver but he's decent enough. Cutting him would be a mistake. Trading him on the other hand ...

- Given the nature of some MSD commenters and the way they like to celebrate good moves by the Dolphins organization on this here blog, I sure hope Tom Brady is not among them. Because if he is, he'll probably knock me up.

... ... ...

- The Dolphins re-signed DT Keith Traylor as well as safety Cameron Worrell. Traylor's an old dude but he's still has some gas left in the tank. It shores up the DT position some as well. Worrell is an ex-Bear who will serve as backup at safety and play some special teams as well.

- Good Hands has found a home with Scott Linehan and the Rams.

- Donte Stallworth paid the Dolphins a visit today. He's already visted the Patriots and Titans. I'd take Stallworth as long as it didn't break the bank. He's a speedy, talented guy. But he's also the Human Hamstring Strain.

- A source says that Trent Green spoke to the Dolphins today (scroll down). Green is set to earn $7.2 million in base salary in 2007. That alone should sound the alarms and flash the red lights. You do not give up a draft pick for a 37 year-old concussed quarterback and pay him 7 million on top of that. You just don't.

- Besides, we need all the picks we can get. We traded Dan Wilkinson to the Broncos for a 6th round pick last week and now he's not sure he wants to keep playing. If he retires, that pick goes poof!


*Thanks for the spell check on Fletcher, Seamus!

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Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Hey, Joey Porter Is A Dolphin

As you know by now, the Dolphins went ahead and signed Joey Porter. I deduced that this would be the case with all the house cleaning they were doing. For the most part – at least from the comments some of you have left – you all seem, um, how shall I put this? Stimulated? Titillated? Ecstatic? Thrilled? Satisfied? Contented? Mmm … let’s say, pleased, with this signing.

Howevvaaa, I have heard that some Dolphins fans are not so happy with this signing. I also heard a certain radio host gibber-jabberin about how Porter is a “decent” player but not a great one and how the Dolphins over paid for him, that he’s old, that the Dolphins front office is sending mixed signals, that we fans are idiots for being enamored with the “big name” but that the quality is not so good, that OLB position is not a position of need, that the Dolphins should be spending millions on offense instead of defense.

Let’s address this crap one at a time:

1. A "decent" player? Joey Porter is a play maker. Period. Here’s a test: name the best linebacker Zach Thomas has ever played alongside with. Morlon Greenwood? Donnie Spragan? Porter will now be the best linebacker Thomas has ever played alongside with. He’s a Pro Bowl linebacker, a Super Bowl champion and a disruptive playmaker who will not only benefit playing with Thomas and JT but will also elevate their play as well. Opposing offensive coordinators are going to be pulling their hair out trying to figure out what to do now that they can’t double up on Taylor. Opposing quarterbacks are in for some bad days against this new-look D.

2. Overpaid? Maybe. But let’s consider what the Dolphins have done in the past by deciding to not to "over pay" and not take chances. Some names: Drew Brees. Apparently wanted too much money. Trent Green (circa 2000 when he was still good). The Rams apparently wanted too much in draft picks and such. I can go on but it’s moot. The market is what it is and if someone else had offered Porter more money and he ended up with another team, the Dolphins would still have a huge void at outside linebacker and the radio hosts would be bashing them for being too cheap. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

3. Too old? Not really. He’ll start the season at 30, which is the peak age. Barring injury (and he’s durable), Porter will be an effective playmaker all the way through his five seasons under contract.

4. Front office sending mixed signals? Again, not really. While this one is debatable because of the way the Fins are purging out their older players, it really isn’t that tough to get a handle on. The Dolphins are cutting older players who have worn out their welcome with sub-par play and huge pay checks. Trading Wes Welker for a 2nd and 7th round pick? The guy was a kick-returner and a No. 3 option, average wide receiver. You make that trade every time. Randy McMichael released? McMichael was simply too expensive for what he brought to the table. The Dolphins also released old, underperforming offensive and defensive linemen. So what’s the mixed signal? All I see here is what Nick Saban should’ve done when he first got here. All I see is a team purging itself of worthless players who were weighing them down with their salaries. Porter is far from being worthless.

5. Fans enamored with the big name. The last time we were enamored with a big name, it came in the form of Daunte Culpepper. But Porter is healthy, comes in with zero question marks and is still one of the elite linebackers in the game. And we like him because of what we’ve seen him do in a Steelers uniform (especially against our Dolphins) and now he’ll be doing those things in a Dolphins uniform against the Pats, Jets, Bills etc. What's not to like? But I guess we’re all a bunch of knee-jerk retards who know nothing about football, huh?

6. The OLB not a position of need? Whaaa???? This statement was all I needed to know that the radio host was, once again, pontificating from his rectum and is a complete and utter moron*. Again, Donnie Spragan? Akbar Gbaja-Biamila? Um, yea, I’ll take Joey Porter, thanks.

*He also made me appreciate his co-host, whom I have bashed a few times here. That show flat out sucks when Dan isn’t there.

7. Spending millions on offense, not defense. Again, the radio host appears to sound smart here because the Dolphins have been anemic on offense. But who’s out there that’s worth the millions we’re giving Porter? This free agent crop was strictly a defensive one. Name all the top offensive free agents this year and what you get were offensive linemen, one – Kris Dielman -- which the Dolphins were willing to spend loads of money on but chose to stay with his old team for less money, and a few other OL who signed with the first team they visited. After that we’re left with names like Jeff Garcia, Donte Stallworth, Kevin Curtis, Drew Bennett, Joe Horn. All good players but none worth the value of a Porter and none that would cause teams to get into bidding wars over. 2007 is a mediocre offensive free agency class. It just is. And once Nate Clements and Adaluis Thomas were snatched up, Porter became the best player in the free agency pool. And I am damn glad we got him.

And by no means is this front office done. It’s March, folks. There’ll be plenty of time to address the offense without over spending or making panic moves (although I do wish the Dolphins would jump in on the Randy Moss sweepstakes because he’s Randy Freakin Moss and, if not for anything else, to drive up the Patriots price for the Raiders… but that’s a topic for another long-winded post.)

So there you have it. Joey Porter’s signing was a great move. He’s going to make an already stout defense even better. He’s going to help carry the weight for Zach and JT. He excells in the 3-4 defense. He'll be a QB-wrecker when teams double-team either Taylor or Thomas. He’s going to be an impact player and it was a smart move by the front office.

Best part of all, I no longer hate Porter! I used to think he was the biggest dick in the NFL. I actively rooted against the Steelers in Super Bowl XL because of Porter. Now, he’s a Dolphin. So we’re cool. And his dogs once ate a live horse, which is pretty awesome.

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Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Report: Dolphins To Sign Joey Porter

The Pittsburgh Tribune-Review is reporting this morning that the Dolphins will sign LB Joey Porter sometime today.
The deal reportedly will be for 5 years, and will pay a total of $24 million, including a $12 million signing bonus.
Not sure how reliable this report is. PFT.com says that the Tribune-Review has a history of "gaffes" in their reporting.
We should know more later today or, perhaps, later this week as Porter is scheduled to meet with the Bengals on Wednesday. Hopefully that meeting won't take place and this report will prove to be true.
I'm heading out of town for the day. So be sure to check on SporTech Matter for any Porter updates JD gets. I'll bang my thoughts when I get back tonight.
Let me just say this before I go: This report makes me giddy. And excited. But mostly giddy...
Go Fins!!!

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Cameron And Mueller Visit With Porter

Cam Cameron and Randy Mueller flew to California to meet with Joey Porter at his home Monday. And according to Porter's agent, Jeff Sperbeck, the former Steelers linebacker was impressed with what he heard.

''[Porter] came away from the meeting very impressed with the direction they are taking the team,'' Sperbeck said. "Joey would be a great addition to the Dolphins.''

And according to NFL.com/NFL Network's Adam Schefter, landing Porter's services seems to be a two team race between the Dolphins and the Cincinnati Bengals. Schefter says the Dolphins are "hopeful" that they can sign Porter but the Bengals could be in a position to out-bid the Fins.

So, it could come down to Monday's meeting with Cam and Muel. Were they able to convince Porter that the team is going in the right direction, that they intend on making him a central piece of the defense, that he will have career seasons playing alongside Zach Thomas and Jason Taylor?... And it'll come down to whether the Bengals will throw a wad of cash Porter's way or not. He is scheduled to visit Cincinnati on Wednesday.

One thing is clear: Joey Porter has become the Dolphins' number one free agent target right now. And that is great news.

Landing Porter would be a huge splash and would mark Cam Cameron and Randy Mueller's first great move of the new era.

And landing Porter would mean seeing plenty of this in the coming seasons. Boo-ya, bitch!

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Monday, March 05, 2007

Goodbye Blue Skies, and Wes and Good Hands...


The Dolphins continued to clean house today.

The Fins have released QB Joey Harrington and TE Randy McMichael. McMichael's release came before the Dolphins were set to pay him a $3 million roster bonus. The Fins also avoided paying Harrington a $1 million roster bonus by releasing him.

Meanwhile, the Dolphins went ahead and traded WR Wes Welker to the Patriots (dealin' with the devil) for their second round pick and a seventh round pick.


Could Olindo Mare's days be numbered too? Maybe.

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Wade Putting Off Surgery, Will Try To Come Back This Season

Dwyane Wade says that he's going to put off surgery and try to make a comeback this season.

"My decision for the next two to three weeks is to rehab with the possibility of coming back, but with no guarantees," Wade said. "I'll find out after therapy and rehab how my body responds to things."

Even by opting for rehab, Wade said he eventually would have to undergo shoulder surgery. By delaying the procedure, it is possible that Wade will miss the early stages of next season."It could have been easy for me just to shut it down,'' he said. "It's tough, because I don't know if I can attack. But my body is my body; I'll find out after the rehab."Wade also revealed he tore his labrum."There's no further damage I can do,'' he said of his medical opinions.

Wade said he remains aware the shoulder could again pop out of place upon his return."You would hope to think you could come back to play a couple of games,'' he said of a potential regular-season return. "My spirits are high. I'm excited to go forward and do the therapy." [Sun-Sentinel]

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Saturday, March 03, 2007

Your Miami Dolphins Free Agent Update

Holy cow, lots has been going on since the NFL free agency kicked off on Friday. Teams are making moves. The 49ers, the Browns and even the Patriots are wheelin and dealin. The Dolphins? MMmm. Not so much. Here's the latest:

-The Dolphins released DE Kevin Carter and OL Jeno James. They also lost OL Seth McKinney and Damien McIntosh who signed with the Chiefs.

-The Dolphins also traded DT Dan "Big Daddy Wilkinson" to Denver for a sixth round pick.

-There's also news that Miami has placed TE Randy "Good Hands" McMichael on the trading block and are asking for a 3rd round pick.

-The Patriots signed WR Wes Welker to an offer sheet, which means the Fins have a week to match the offer. However, if the Pats end up signing Welker, Miami would get their second round pick in April's draft.

-The Patriots also signed RB Sammy Morris.

As for non-Dolphins free agents ... My free agent wish list has pretty muched blowed up. Let's re-cap, shall we?:

-CB Nate Clements signed with the 49ers for a rEEEdiculous 10 year, $80 million deal.

-OL Eric Steinbach signed with the Browns.

-OL Kris Dielman decided he likes to play for winners and re-signed with the Chargers.
-LB Adalius Thomas signed with the Mother F%$## Patriots!!!!! F%$#!!! F%$#!!! F%$#!!!

-OL Derrick Dockery signed with Buffalo. Again, F%$#!!!

-FB Ovie Mughelli signed with the Falcons.

-That leaves my boy Ken Hamlin from the Seahawks. He's yet un-signed and I'm telling you, the Dolphins need to make a move on this guy....

My expert analysis: This sucks! The only thing I can think of is that the Fins are getting ready to make a serious push for former Steelers LB Joey Porter with all this extra cap space they're making. Either that, or they're already bagging the 2007 season by going really young, positioning themselves for another top 10 draft pick in 2008 and looking at next year's free agent crop. Meanwhile Welker and Sammy will both have career years with the Pats. It's bad enough Larry Izzo has a Super Bowl ring and Zach Thomas doesn't. Crap.

C'mon Muel! Make a damn move already!!! Subtraction is nice but ADDITIONS ARE BETTER!!!

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Friday, March 02, 2007

Nothin' But Diesel

Shaquille O'Neal will not have you chanting in his house.

The Big Daddy saved his best game of the season for the Pistons with a dominant performance Friday night.
The Heat was outscored 26-11 in the second half after holding a commanding 22-point lead in the first. Shaq scored 9 of the Heat's third-quarter points on 3-of-4 shooting. The rest of the Heat were 1 for 10.
Shaq had to beat Detroit by himself. 31 points, 15 rebounds, 6 assists, 7-14 from the stripe and he even drew a charge from Tayshaun Prince at crunch time.
When the rest of the Heat got cold, the Diesel placed the team on his gigantic shoulders and bull-dozed his way to victory. The Pistons drew within 3 points in the closing seconds. But it was Chris Webber who took the final shot so, you know, I don't have to tell you the result.


Final: Miami 85 - Deeeeeeetroit 82



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Thursday, March 01, 2007

The MSD Miami Dolphins Free Agent Wish List

Tonight, when the clock strikes 12:01 AM, NFL teams can officially start signing free agents. The Dolphins have needs up the wahzoo. Here now is my top 10 wish list of free agents I hope the Dolphins will target. This list comprises only players that are unrestricted free agents. No more giving up draft picks nnndammit! They are in order of team-needs and personal desire. We don’t have a lot of room salary cap wise, so we’re going to have to hope and use some imagination. Let’s start the insanity …

1. CB Nate Clements, Buffalo: The best cornerback on the market. Clements has great size, speed and agility and has immense potential to be the next great shut down corner in the NFL. He’s a ball hawk who sticks to receivers and who quarterbacks avoid at all costs. He knows how to jam receivers and uses his length brilliantly to bat down passes and disrupt plays. And he’s only 27 years old. The Dolphins secondary is in dire need of playmakers and Clements is the one guy I’d target above all others this free agency season. He’s obviously going to be in high demand but the Dolphins need to throw their hat in the ring for this guy.

2. OL Eric Steinbach, Cincinnati: He’s the best unrestricted offensive lineman in my opinion. The 26 year old Steinbach has all the tools to be an effective pass protector. He’s young, strong and durable. He’s a great athlete for his position and has long arms and is fluid off the line. He’s well known for being a student of the game and can be very aggressive and technical. He would make an excellent left guard or left tackle and has even played some center.

3. OL Kris Dielman, San Diego: Obviously, Cam Cameron knows Dielman who played for Cam with San Diego the past two seasons. He’s strong, durable and young (26). He’s going to be highly sought after and for good reason. Not only was he a part of an offensive line that helped MVP LaDanian Tomlinson set running back records in 2006, Dielman is also considered one of the toughest and meanest guards in the league. As a former defensive lineman, Dielman is a great athlete and is nimble as well as quick with his feet. Strong, durable and with a ton of upside, Dielman might actually be the one guy the Fins do land through free agency and he would be a great addition.

4. LB Adalius Thomas, Baltimore: This guy landing on the Dolphins is a long shot. But a man can dream. Thomas is one of the most versatile linebackers in the NFL. He’s built like a truck, is really fast, can break off blocks and is massively disruptive to both the passing and running games. He has a nose for rushing the passer and is extremely powerful. Imagine this guy playing along side Zach, and Crowder while opening things up for JT. Holy Moses!!
5. SS Ken Hamlin, Seattle: Hamlin is one of those guys I think has been flying under the radar because of a head injury that knocked him out for the season in 2005. Hamlin is a vicious hitter who has great instincts and flies to the ball. He has great quickness and knows how to read offenses well. He’s a versatile player who has played at both strong and free safety. He’s more effective as a cover guy but can also be a big help in run defenses as his speed and aggressive nature make him an effective tackler and blitzer.

6. OL Derrick Dockery, Washington: He’s a sound blocker who is tough and durable. Dockery has a lot of power and is quick off the snap. He’s not terribly agile but is a bruiser, is athletic for his size and is a player who can bring a lot of stability to an offensive line. He’s not as talented as Dielman or Steinbach but for a guy with his talents and age (26) could be a bargain.

7. FS Deon Grant, Jacksonville: This guy is everything Nick Saban thought Jason Allen would be. I know a lot of you dislike Allen. I am still holding out judgment on him but you guys have a real good case against him. Grant is a fantastic athlete with good speed and leadership skills. He’s long and rangy as well as tough and durable. He’s mainly a cover guy but is smart enough to pick up Dom Capers’ sometimes complex schemes and do well in them.

8. FB Ovie Mughelli, Baltimore: The Dolphins have lacked a true, bull-rushing, hole smashing full back. At 6,1 255 lbs. Mughelli is a solid full back and definitely better than what we’ve had at the position in recent seasons. He’s a sound run blocker who attacks powerfully and plays aggressively. He’s also athletic enough to catch passes and can break tackles on short routes. He’s not a mountain but he’s someone who I think would mesh well in the Dolphins backfield and help Ronnie Brown a ton, especially in short yardage situations.

9. CB Nick Harper, Indianapolis: He’s had an up and down career but is coming off a huge season for the Colts. He’s tough, fast, plays the run well and has an eye for turnovers.

10. LB London Fletcher, Buffalo: He’s a veteran and the Dolphins need youth but Fletcher is a great play maker who plays very aggressive and brings a lot of leadership. He knows how to shed blockers and would be a nice compliment to Zach Thomas and Channing Crowder. Buffalo is going to want to re-sign him so there’s no point in getting into a bidding war for a 30+ year old linebacker but it’d be nice to have him.


Likeliest To End Up In Miami: 1.) Dielman. Cam Cameron knows him and the Dolphins have made no secret of their desire to sign him. 2.) Dockery. He’s a bargain (i.e. cheap compared to the other guys) and a solid player and would fill a need nicely. 3.) Mughelli. Just a hunch. But I think Cam wants to build a solid running game and Mughelli would be a relative bargain. The man knows running games.

Biggest Sleeper: Hamlin. I really think Hamlin’s only suitor will be his 2006 team, Seattle. If I were the Muel, I’d jump on this guy immediately (not literally, of course). Hamlin is going to be a star in this league and needs to play for a hard hitting, gritty, scrappy defense like Miami’s. Get em!!

Omitted from the list: Wide receivers. There is not one free agent WR that gets me going this year. Not one. Donte Stallworth? He’s a hamstring injury waiting to happen. Ashlie Lelie? Are you kidding? Those of you who’ve had Lelie on your fantasy teams know what I’m talking about. Bobby Wade? Who? Keenan McCardell? Old. Drew Bennett? White. Kevin Curtis? Ditto.

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I Want To Help You Ricky. Clean My Dog's Crap Off The Carpet!

This via Deadspin.com and brought to our attention by MSD Nation Card Carrying Member Dat Roro Kid: Seems our very own space cadet, the incomparable Ricky Williams has found himself someone who finally, truly understands the very depth of him. His new “Swami.”

“ … A sign on a door inside the main building: 'Blessed self: No entry, please. Office staff only.'' This is where Ricky Williams spends his non-football days, teaching (without pay) and studying yoga and its many elements, such as meditation, spiritualism and positivism.”

Here’s the money shot:

“After the class, he was approached by Swami Sita, the camp's director. She told him, ‘I have a job for you.’ She gave Ricky a sledgehammer and asked him to knock down two old sheds. It took him two days. It's called karma yoga, selfless service.

Swami Sita and Williams sat and talked, and he says, ‘I've always felt misunderstood, but in two hours, she was able to understand me better than anyone has in my whole life.’ "


So Ricky has always felt misunderstood. He finally meets someone who understands his depth and his spirituality. A woman who pulled the ole “selfless service karma” card and had her most muscular, physically fit, current pro football athlete student knock down two old sheds.
Undoubtedly she asked the fat chick in her class to scrub the brown ring stains from her toilet bowl and that one dude in the class who stands at 6'9" to clean the bird shit off the ledge over the front door.
You know, for karma and spiritual enlightenment.

Oh, that Ricky. He’s incorrigible!

By the way, Swami Sita? That's made up, right? Ay Swamisita!!

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