Thursday, May 31, 2007

Disrespected?: Joey Porter Could Face Lawsuit, Suspension

Joey Porter was ordered to pay a $1,000 fine for misdemeanor battery for attacking Bengals' offensive tackle Levi Jones in a Vegas Casino last March. If that weren't enough, Adam "My Scoops Are Always Right" Schefter is reporting that Jones may throw a civil suit on Porter's ass. Jones is citing "emotional distress" over the incident, which in court-talk means: lawsuit.
Porter could also be facing a suspension from the NFL. In case you've been unaware of it, or have been oblivious to all things NFL lately, there's a new sheriff in town. His name is Roger Goodell. He's a hardboiled, no nonsense son of a bitch. And he likes to slap suspensions like he was giving away candy. He'll slap players when they get in trouble. And they'll take it and like it.
Goodell could rule Porter's crime worthy of suspension under the league's new personal conduct policy. Some believe Porter could escape the suspension, but with Goodell running things, you just never know.

If Porter is suspended, he can always hang out with Vick and his fighting dogs. Place your money on Porter's dogs.


Wednesday, May 30, 2007

NBA Nation This Saturday

The good folks at NBA Nation have asked me to pass this along to you guys:

NBA Nation is coming to Miami this Saturday at the Goombay Festival. NBA Nation features a wealth of interactive NBA themed activities.

Along with an expandable 18-wheeler that turns into an interactive arena where you can watch the NBA’s 50 Greatest Plays on a 50’’ flat screen monitor, play the latest NBA video games, or “Measure Up” your height, arm span, hand & shoe size to your favorite NBA Players.
Also, the NBA Nation event will host an NBA Skills Challenge Competition who’s winners will travel to Philadelphia in July to represent Miami.

Saturday's Highlights also include:

12 – 1 PM: Meet Burnie, the Heat mascot

4 - 5PM: The Heat Dancers!

4 - 5PM: Glen Rice! That’s right, G-Money will be there!

Sounds like a lot of fun and a great event for families as well.

NBA Nation at the Goombay Festival this Saturday, June 2nd 10AM – 8 PM

SW 32nd & Grand Avenues

For more info, check out NBA


Culpepper Warns Green ... And Third Year Players

- Trent Green believes he would be given a ''much more fair chance'' to win the starting job in Miami than in Kansas City. Daunte Culpepper says not so fast Trent Green!
``For a guy, for anybody who thinks that whatever their situation is where
they're at and they're coming here, and it's going to be peaches and cream,
that's not the case.''
If you can get past the first part of that sentence, Culpepper is basically saying Green is not just going to be given the job -- not as long as Culpepper has anything to say about it. It's good to see C-Pep being this competetive about the starting job and he has really handled himself like a pro since Cam Cameron came into town. So I think it's only fair to let C-Pep and Green duke it out for the job. Ultimately, however, once Green is a Dolphin he will be the starting QB come September. Whoever wins the job will only hold it for a year anyway. Or at least until John Beck is ready to take over.

However you slice it, the Dolphins QB problem is going to continue to be a mess. Come Septemeber, we'll either have a head of lettuce, a lemon or a Lemon at QB. Yippee.

- Saban's first draft class to shine in 2007? According to some, including Zach Thomas, the third season is when a player begins to make the jump.
CB Travis Daniels:
Was plauged by an ankle injury last season but now says he's "300 percent better." Really bad math cliche' aside, Daniels is yet to justify Saban's belief that he would be a part of a younger, much improved secondary. Even when healthy he's not shown he can be a number 1 or 2 CB. Still, with Andre Goodman nursing a shoulder injury, we're going to need Travis and his ankle to give us 300 percent effort with 1,000 percent results!

DL Matt Roth: He's shown shades of talent here and there. And the Dolphins are really counting on him this year after letting veteran Kevin Carter go. Roth took up martial arts in the off-season to improve his conditioning and stamina. So, if all else fails, he can always sweep Tom Brady and put him in a Morote Seoinage.

LB Channing Crowder: For some reason, lots of folks don't like Channing. But I do. And I think he's going to have a solid season playing with Zach and The Horse Killer this year.

RB Ronnie Brown: And then there's Ronnie. No he's not LaDanian Tomlinson. But he's going to be used like LT in Cam's offense. So that has to be good. Cam told Ronnie to lose some weight and told him he plans to use him a lot in passing plays. Ronnie also says he's highly motivated after hearing that Phil Simms said Brown lacks the "wow" factor. If Ronnie has to draw motivation from Phil Simms, we might be in trouble. But I have faith in Ronnie. He's got the stuff. He just needs the O-line to make holes for him and he needs to stay healthy.

In other words, look to pick up Lorenzo Booker in your fantasy leagues this year.


Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Trent Green Still Not A Dolphin ... And Tom Brady Is A Douche

Hope everyone had a happy and safe Memorial Day weekend.

Tuesday Dolphins Bullets:

- Trent Green told 790 the Ticket that he is 90% sure he'll be a Dolphin. He also says that his age and concussion should not be an issue as he's been cleared to play by four different neurosurgeons and neuropcychologists. Green also mentioned that Brett Favre is the same age and has more wear and tear than Green. Green did not mention that Favre is a far superior quarterback with a better arm and a tougher disposition (even if it is with the aid of illegally obtained pain killers).

- Ted Ginn Jr. will be reporting for duty June 7th, one day before the start of the next minicamp. The Dolphins say that Ginn is making progress on his foot injury (is it me, or is that injury taking a long-ass time to heal?). Progress is good.

- Chris Chambers is moving from the Z slot to the X. This means he'll have better chances of lining up against guys one-on-one and exploit mis-matches. No word on whether the change has improved his butterfingeritis.

- In case you forgot or needed a reminder: Tom Brady is an asswipe. I prefer douchebag. But asswipe will do.

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Friday, May 25, 2007

YouTube Interlude 3, Bullets and A Hashmarks Review!

Ahh ... end of the week. Three day weekend ahead. Very nice. I leave you with one last YouTube entry for the week: "You just murdered one of your employees with a trident!"

And Bullets below!

- The Marlins and Phils rivalry is one of the quietest in the MLB. What with all the oversaturated Red Sox-Yankees coverage at the World Wide Leader. JD has the video of last night's bench clearing shouting match. Oh and, the Marlins won on a Miguel Cabrera walk-off double in the 11th. Fuck you Phillies!

- Trent Green alternatives? Let's see ... the options here are Jake Plummer, Seneca Wallace, Kyle Orton, and Aaron Brooks. Holy mother of God! Really? A guy who loves throwing the ball to the other team especially in crucial situations ... a guy who is just another version of Ray Lucas ... a guy who can't beat out Rex Grossman ... and a guy who was benched in favor of Andrew Walter even though he had Randy Moss as a target. Holy shit we're getting desperate!

- Greg Bedard says don't mind them rumors about the Falcons making a run for Trent Green. As reported here again and again -- Green will not go anywhere else other than Miami. He has already said he will only restructure his contract for the Dolphins. Unless someone is stupid enough to pay him $7.2 million to be a backup. I am now yelling the words Carl Peterson! while I pretend cough.

- The Dolphins have announced that center Rex Hadnot will move to right guard. Plugging holes in a dam with Bubbleyum.

- ESPN is getting desperate. They've just launched their own "irreverent" football blog called Hashmarks. I've read it. And here's my review: SHIT. The guy who does it, Matt Mosely is supposedly a real-life columnist (which, right there, defeats the purpose) and in trying to keep up with real blogs, tries a bit too hard to be ... funny is the word I'm looking for here, I guess. Anyway, the blog sucks. It's just a desperate attempt by ESPN to corner the market already being ruled by real blogs that are worth my time like Deadspin, KSK, the Big Lead, Awful Announcing and others. Here's Will's take on it. I might change my mind if Mosely publishes pictures of Sean Salisbury's "Lil Sean." Just for the sake of posterity. Otherwise ... too little time, too many other blogs to read... Fuck off ESPN.

- And finally ... looks more and more like it's going to be a Spurs-Pistons finals. Let it be known: Most NBA fans (outside of San Antonio and Detroit) are bemoaning this. Because the series promises to be boring and possibly break the record for most flops and shocked-looks after foul calls in NBA Finals history. Looks like the Heat-Mavs finals last year will be something folks will long for -- when a finals had action, excitement, Shaq, Dirk, Cuban and a bonafide super star in Dwyane Wade.

And I know he's still only 22 and that the future is still very bright for LeBron James. But we can pretty much put those Wade or James debates to bed. At least for now. I realize D-Wade had the benefit of O'Neal at his side and James has mediocre teammates. But you have to admit this: Right now, Wade has bigger cojones than James. Period. He knows how to close out games, wants to take the last shot and has the will to take over a series all by himself. Can't say that about James.

Well ... Have a happy and safe Memorial Day weekend! Semper Fi!

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Thursday, May 24, 2007

YouTube Interlude 2

While I work on the new MSD site and while nothing is happening with the Dolphins (unless you find Greg Cote's incoherent idiotic bat-shit stupid ramblings really interesting), I'll be posting some of my favorite YouTube clips here to pass the time.

Today's clip: Lewis Black's End of the Universe. It's the clean version, so it's okay for work. Enjoy.

Thanks to Seamus for the Cote link.


Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Trent Green Update: Nothing, Really.

BREAKING DOLPHINS NEWS: Oh wait. Never mind.

Whoa! What's that? Trent Green had a press conference? Oh. Wait. He's still a Chief? Oh...
Maybe it's because I'm not the biggest Green fan in the world. Maybe it's because this is what I said would happen all along. Maybe it's because the off-season after the draft is like watching a Judge Judy marathon while sitting in a dentist waiting room for an hour or two. But my reaction to this is pretty subjective: meh.
Either way, at least now it's official -- Green says he's unhappy and wants out of KC and come to Miami. The best news of all for me is that Randy never budged on Carl Peterson's ridiculous demands. So, like I said: Green will be a Dolphin because he'll either be released or traded to us for that 6th round pick. Or, Peterson can keep acting the part of the tough guy and have himself a very unhappy 7.5 million dollar third-string quarterback on his roster.

So to recap: Trent Green wants to be a Miami Dolphin. He's still a KC Chief. Earth-shattering, I know.

JD weighs in on this while pointing out Green's MILF wife. JD is a talented blogger.


Tuesday, May 22, 2007

YouTube Interlude 1

While I work on the new MSD site and while nothing is happening with the Dolphins (unless you find this really interesting), I'll be posting some of my favorite YouTube clips here to pass the time.

Here's one of my heroes, Louis CK (NSFW). Enjoy.

Oh, and Dane Cook can suck a bag of dicks!

Where The Hell You Been???

Sorry -- again -- for the lack of posts, MSD Nation. Work has been, well, hell. Believe me, if the Heat were still in the playoffs, I'd be blogging. I'd be getting an hour and a half sleep every night. But I'd be blogging.

Also -- and more importantly -- I am currently working on moving MSD. I've had it with blogger. So, I'm moving the site to another blog-machine. So as soon as it's up, I'll let you know. I decided to stop being a cheap-ass bastard and pay for a good service that'll make this site more enjoyable for me to write on and, hopefully, more enjoyable for you to read. So don't quit on me. I'm still here!

I appreciate everyone's patience. I appreciate the e-mails checking to see if I'm still alive. That was nice of you. Morbid. But nice.

Until then ... while I work on my new site, ease back into normalcy and wait for something really interesting to happen in the SoFla sports scene, I'll be posting some of my favorite shit from You Tube to pass the time.

Oh, and you can always visit me at The Phish Tank.

Monday, May 14, 2007

The Return

Hey MSD Nation. I'm back! I know I said I'd return on Monday but decided to stay away for a bit longer. My trip was a refreshing one but, as it is with all trips, I got back all lagged with a fried brain and a week-long hangover. Why do vacations do that to a person?

Anyway ... good to be back. There's not much going on in Miami sports right now. The Heat are licking their wounds, the Dolphins are in between camps, and the Canes are in purgatory as well. We do have the Marlins but I've learned that talking about the Marlins here is the equivalent to turning on the lights in my kitchen in the middle of the night and watching dozens of roaches scurry off in fright. Okay, I think I just compared my readers to roaches. See. I'm not quite ready to blog with coherent thoughts just yet. Sorry bout that. Anyway, Marlins talk here is an excercise in futility. (But I'll still do it when the moment calls for it.)
As for the Fins -- you can read my take on the latest Ricky Williams drama over at The Phish Tank.
So, with all that said, blogging might be a little sporatic in the coming weeks. That is until something important happens.

Until then, check back when you can. Good to be back...

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

I Done Need A Break

Wassup, MSD Nation.
I’m taking a few days off and heading out of town for a little R&R. Some chillin, some surfing, some kayaking and some reading. But mostly, some chillin.

Vacation time!

I’ll be back next week to resume my inane observations on all things Miami sports related.
So come back and see me on Monday or Tuesday (depending on how fried or jet-lagged I am from the return trip).
By the way, I wanted to thank you guys for making the draft live-blog the most successful day for the MSD since I started this thing. You showed up in droves. Along with all the hits, those of you who commented during the live-blog made it all worth while. I'll be announcing the winner of the mock draft contest when I get back. Anyway ... you guys kick ass. I love you all.

Until then, JD will keep you abreast on all things Miami sports related. If I don't don't come back it means I met a special someone out on the beach and have run off.

Take it easy.

-The Dude

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