Thursday, March 01, 2007

I Want To Help You Ricky. Clean My Dog's Crap Off The Carpet!

This via and brought to our attention by MSD Nation Card Carrying Member Dat Roro Kid: Seems our very own space cadet, the incomparable Ricky Williams has found himself someone who finally, truly understands the very depth of him. His new “Swami.”

“ … A sign on a door inside the main building: 'Blessed self: No entry, please. Office staff only.'' This is where Ricky Williams spends his non-football days, teaching (without pay) and studying yoga and its many elements, such as meditation, spiritualism and positivism.”

Here’s the money shot:

“After the class, he was approached by Swami Sita, the camp's director. She told him, ‘I have a job for you.’ She gave Ricky a sledgehammer and asked him to knock down two old sheds. It took him two days. It's called karma yoga, selfless service.

Swami Sita and Williams sat and talked, and he says, ‘I've always felt misunderstood, but in two hours, she was able to understand me better than anyone has in my whole life.’ "

So Ricky has always felt misunderstood. He finally meets someone who understands his depth and his spirituality. A woman who pulled the ole “selfless service karma” card and had her most muscular, physically fit, current pro football athlete student knock down two old sheds.
Undoubtedly she asked the fat chick in her class to scrub the brown ring stains from her toilet bowl and that one dude in the class who stands at 6'9" to clean the bird shit off the ledge over the front door.
You know, for karma and spiritual enlightenment.

Oh, that Ricky. He’s incorrigible!

By the way, Swami Sita? That's made up, right? Ay Swamisita!!

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He's deep. I wonder if she's going to ask him to do more crap ala Mr. Miagi and the wax on wax off stuff.
I have a task for Ricky to do: The path to TRUE spiritual enlightenment is off-tackle or between the guard and tackle. Hit that hole, Ricky...gain 1500 yards and the path to glory and righteousness will reveal itself. You dick.

Asshole made me stop wearing his jersey for TWO WHOLE FUCKING SEASONS because of his shennanigans. Hasn't he heard of fucking Carbo-Clean?

I still kinda love him though. He's the Michael Jackson of football.

Thanks for the shout-out, Dude. or Duder. or el Duderino....
Carbo-Clean! That's classic. (Tastes like shit by the way)

I gave my Ricky jersey away. But I too would welcome him back with open arms. Having him and Ronnie in the backfield would be the tits. A bit nerve wracking. But the tits nonetheless.
LMAO...his jersey is at the back of my closet...

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