Tuesday, May 23, 2006

“Do You Stand For Goodness Or For Badness?” A Heat – Pistons Series Preview

Golf and basketball have nothing in common. I suppose except for the object of the games, which is to get a ball onto a hole. Unlike most of you, I’m not a big golf guy. I’ve been golfing once or twice and I sucked at it and that was that. But in honor of the Heat and in honor of one of my all time favorite movies, and for no other reason but to amuse myself as I preview this series, I give you the Eastern Conference Championship Series Preview Through Lines From Caddy Shack

1. Point Guards
“A flute without holes, is not a flute. A donut without a hole, is a danish”

Last season, the Heat had no real point guard to speak of. We had to endure Damon Jones as our primary point guard. There was nothing like watching him take the full ten seconds to dribble the ball down the court backwards before setting up the offense. And there was nothing like his 1 point in Game 7. This season, Pat Riley got Jason Williams to command that role, as well as Gary Payton to fill in. J-Dub is excellent at getting the ball down court and, being the pure point guard that he is, is a vast improvement over Jones. Still, he has always been and will continually be a defensive liability. We can’t expect too much from J-Dub when he guards Chauncey Billups and we can only hope Payton can help slow Mr. Big Shot down. Still, I like going into this with Williams and Payton over Jones.
Edge: Pistons

2. Shooting Guards
“IT'S IN THE HOLE!!! IT’S IN THE HOLE!!!”

Without Eddie Jones in the lineup, it’s up to Dwyane Wade to step up and play defense against Richard Hamilton. Look for Rip to be aggressive against Wade, whose defense has been very suspect in these playoffs so far. James Posey will step in and help from time to time, but Rip is too quick to be contained by either Wade or Posey. So it will come down to which two guard ends up with the most points, really. Rip is a great player. But never bet against D-Wade.
Edge: Heat

3. Small Forward
“Remember Danny, two wrongs don't make a right but three rights make a left.”

The question of the ages here is Which Antoine Walker Will Show Up? Toine has been lights out this post-season and has kept the Heat boo-birds largely at bay. But Toine has never had success against the Pistons. He’s gone 4-19, 6-19, 5-14 and 4-10 in the last four games against Detroit and now will have the tall task of slowing down Tayshaun Prince, who seems to be playing very un-Tayshaun Prince like lately (translation: he's been scoring a lot). Prince will probably be called to guard Wade most of the time, but he will also be all over Walker. So as to not boo Toine, let us go into this thing assuming he’s not going to have a good series. And let’s just leave it at that.
Edge: Pistons

4. Power Forward
“Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.”

Rasheed Wallace has a height advantage over Udonis Haslem. But U plays him tough and he plays him smart. Haslem will probably only guard Sheed in the paint, leaving Posey and others to guard Wallace’s three point attempts. What Haslem must do here is attack the boards and draw fouls from Wallace. Even though Rasheed Wallace has never, never, ever, in his entire life, ever actually committed a real foul. Ever. One of Haslem's strengths is his foul shooting, which could favor Miami down the stretch. It could also frustrate Wallace and get him in Technical trouble. Also, Wallace is playing with a slight ankle sprain and has not had avery good playoffs so far. This means a lot more of Antonio McDyess and he is always a handful.
Slight Edge: Pistons

5. Center
“Then how do you measure yourself with other golfers?” “By height.”

Shaquille O’Neal has pretty much owned Ben Wallace in one on one matchups, which is how the Pistons usually guard Shaq. Look for Shaq to get his numbers and for him and Alonzo Mourning to do serviceable jobs against Wallace defensively. There are only two real concerns here. One will be how the refs call each game. Shaq will, without a doubt, be the go-to-guy in the Heat’s offense and they will need him to stay out of foul trouble. The other concern will be rebounding. Wallace is usually the main reason the Pistons get multiple shot opportunities off misses. Shaq, Zo and Haslem will have to be like wild dogs when crashing the boards. Rebounds is what ultimately did in the Cavaliers. Still you gotta go with the Daddy-Diesel over the Crazy-Ass-Fro
Edge: Heat

6. Coaching
“I have to laugh, because I've outsmarted even myself.”

Flip Saunders easily has the cushiest coaching job in the NBA. His only job requirements is to get Rasheed Wallace to shut up against referees, get his guys to play like they care sometimes, and call in substitutes when the situation calls for it. Saunders received a lot of flack for Detroit’s struggles against Cleveland and will have the glare of the Detroit media if the Pistons lose this series. Likewise, Pat Riley used the off season for precisely this series. He traded away Eddie Jones and got James Posey, Jason Williams and Antoine Walker for this. He too has come under a lot fire for these moves. So something will have to give. Still, who in their right mind would pick Flip over Riles in a coaching matchup?
Edge: Heat

7. Bench

“Don’t sell yourself short, Judge. You’re a tremendous slouch.”

The only real threat off the Piston’s bench is McDyess. The Heat have Alonzo Mourning, James Posey, Gary Payton and, lest we forget, MICHAEL DOLEAC!!!
Depth always comes in handy during this time of year.
Edge: Heat

8. Prediction
“Hey everybody, we're all gonna get laid!”

Most have the Pistons winning this series in seven. It will be a big blow to lose this opportunity for the Heat. They’re getting older. The window of opportunity is closing fast and younger, up and coming teams like Cleveland, Washington and Chicago are getting better with each passing season. This may be Miami’s best and only chance to advance to their first ever finals. It’s going to be a barn burner. So, as a homer I’m picking the Heat. But I'm also picking them because I think the Heat just want it more. I know that doesn’t translate into numbers and the Sheer Desire theory would make Boog Shiambi and Dan Le Batard both have brain aneurisms if they read this (and is that a bad thing, really?). But I think the Heat are hungrier to win this and I think Riley, Shaq and D-Wade will do everything they have to, to push Miami through.

Heat in Seven

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Comments:
what took so long to post, dude? busy day?

awright, I'll stop busting your balls.

love the movie choice.

Heat in 6

LET'S GO HEAT
 
Yea, sorry about the late post Rojo.

In fact, this has NOT been one of my best posts.

They're working on the hurricane damaged roof here and the noise and the dirt are making for such a wonderful and peaceful work environment. So ... I'm hoping the Caddy Shack lines make up for the suspect post today.

But ... no excuses dammit. I came to play ball. I came to post and I post like a mother f****r!!

And I'm sticking with my prediction: Heat in 7.
 
Heat in 7. It's a tough call but I agree with you Dude. The Heat want this more. I think D-Wade has the series of his young career.
 
Excellent post Dude! Entertaining as usual! Just give those roof workers some Gold Label and they will take a break for 2 hours so you can get some blogging done.

Heat in 6 Baby!
 
"Even though Rasheed Wallace has never, never, ever, in his entire life, ever actually committed a real foul. Ever."

It's funny because it's true. Rashweed is a grade A imbecile
 
Heat in 6

JD, I'll have one of them Gold Labels if you got em.
 
Sorry to say, but I see the Pistons winning this in 6 or 7. Our defense cannot handle the Pistons. God I hope I'm wrong. But my expectations are not all that high. Too negative?
 
how do you feel about it now scott?

even though we got game 1, i still think it goes 7.

heat in 7

lets go heat!
 
Many people try to achieve goals. Most fail. Some strive, work hard and plan for all the details yet they achieve little or nothing at all. Others strive, work hard, plan and achieve huge success. Yet there are a few individuals who do little else than take small steps and seem to achieve a great deal with what seems like effortlessness. What is the difference between these people and which one would you like to be?
Most members of the human race fall into two categories - those who live in the past and those who live in the future. Most live in the past. Many of these are the people who achieve very little in their lives and are so fearful of the future that they dare not strike out to get anything. They are the under-achievers who hang onto bad episodes in their lives and either relive them time and again or look at new situations as similar potentialities. They say things like "all men are deceivers" or "all women are interested in is money" or "I can't do it. I tried before and it didn't work so why bother!". Due to bad experiences in the past they believe that all future events will turn out the same way if they dare to go after what they want.
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However, there is a third type of person who almost goes unnoticed. They are the person who takes life in its stride and yet achieve most of what they want. I am sure you know of such a person in your life that just seems to saunter through life and yet they always come out on top. Or a person who you hear of that has decided to open a shop. You meet them a few months later and they have three shops all doing well! So what makes these people so successful and if they aren't living in the past and aren't living in the future where are they living?
I suppose you guessed it! Whether they are consciously aware of it or not they are living in the present. It is in the 'living' present that we have our greatest power. Everything happens in the present. You live your entire life there - even if your mind does not!

By becoming more aware of the present and by 'accepting' it as it is we are much more in control of our emotions and focus. When we live in the past we are fearful of making bad choices and/or getting hurt. We do not wish to recreate the past again! When we live in the future we can also be fearful of what might happen. But even if your future vision is full of power and worthy of working towards many people can, and often do, get stuck there. By constantly reaching for bigger and better goals they fail to enjoy what they have in the moment.
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